Friday, November 13, 2009

Drawing the Line


I know I’ve returned to the blogging world earlier than I thought I would and this is a totally unintended and unplanned blog post but I have to have to have to write about this. Not forgetting that I have an exam in eleven hours, I’m going to be as blunt and straightforward and as to-the-point as possible (well, I’ll at least try!)

I haven’t been blogging over the last month or so but I haven’t disconnected myself from the World Wide Web! I have been accessing e-mails, checking (and updating) Facebook and twitter and about four hours ago I received an email to which I choose to reply via my blog (I've done enough of costing anyway!) and thereby lay some ground rules.

Over the last few days I have been receiving (lengthy) comments from someone on some of my blog posts which were very personal (the posts) and the comments, well they were hardly related to what I had to say and were way way way off topic.

So instead of narrating, I’m pasting the comments verbatim without rectifying the typo errors (and also providing a link to the post to which they relate!) and adding my comments (in brackets and in italics.) The sarcasm in the comments is very very intentional.

Oh and readers’ comments on this blog are moderated, which means you’ll be able to see the comments when you post them, but they’ll appear on the blog for public viewing only when I accept them! And if I reject them, you wont be able to see them later. Duh!


"It seems Dodi Princess despite built in 1991, is still in service, reactivated after repairs in 2005.... (The post talks about my experience in a pub in Ghana when I was 11 and I’ve given a few details about the vacation out of which one detail was that we cruised along Lake Volta on this boat called Dodi Princess. What am I supposed to do with this piece of information?? It’s as if he typed “Dodi Princess” on Google and pasted whatever information he could find!!!)


(Point No. 11 says, “I want to live in a foreign country for some part of my life. Maybe I can accomplish that if I go abroad to study. A part of me wants to experience the student life in America or Europe. Have nothing concrete planned yet. But yes, it is my dream to actually live (not just go for a holiday) in a foreign country for sometime.”)

“Comment to Point No.11: Enhancing career by acquiring degrees from univeristies of Europe/US is appriciable. But there is flip side to staying in Europe/US vis a vis India. The first time you land in India from these places for spending the holidays, you tend to compare the living standards of US/Europe with that of India and it will be painful to accept the truth that India is still lagging behind in so many ways. From personal experience, when I first landed in India after spending some time in Hong Kong, I realised that My God, India is dirty (Wow! What a patriot!). We clean our homes with religious zeal only to make our locality/society more dirtier (Hello! I don’t… Please do not generalise. I care about my surroundings as much as I do about my home.) We donot recognise Pedestrian rights. We are indisciplined drivers on road, we honk, shout and bully (I don’t know who “We” is but it definitely includes him in it… And what the hell does all this have to do with my dream of spending some time abroad as a student?) Our roads are pathetic and we are busy making money by all means for ourselves by any means possible, we are patriotic strictly only during wars and cricket matches. Our air ports are primitive, bascically engaged in separating the passengers from thier luggage and re-uniting the two. Things never reach a completion here, like you move into a new flat and you find some stray paint marks and concrete and cement stuck on places where least expected, (what????) you go the newly inaugurated 5 star hotel and you find work in progress in the parking lot, you cruise through the newly inaugurated flyover and you find some painting work in progress on the side walks. India does not follow the standards and in the race of asian economies, India more often than not is likely to be stuck in some traffic jam. It will be a real hard decison to take once given a chioce to be back to India or to take up a job abroad. Love for the country may take a back seat, and you may justify it by assuming that if you go back India, you cannot do any good to your country anyway (I’m assuming he’s still in Hong Kong or anywhere other than India as his list of “Cons” of coming back to India is way longer than his love for our country!)

[Some views in comment above is inspired by the blogs of Mr.Subrato Bagchi, CEO of Mindtree]” (So???? What is this comment doing in “25 Random things about Me” and why have I accepted it??? Silly me!)


I did not accept the comment but it had something to say about my abrasive voice, accent and language (choice of words.) There are more comments on these lines. So I will handle them together!


Here I talked about a very irritating experience at one of my best friends’ birthday dinners.

“This blog is a special one (Really? Was he your best friend too????) as this one deals with a subject which comes into the category of 'mature' (Duh!!!) Additionally it can also be argued that the Mumbai Local's women compartments have a significanly higher decibel level that the other compartments...it is true...” (Wow… Comparison of the din created at a restaurant with the decibel levels in Mumbai’s Local trains???? And that too, the Ladies compartment… Apparently, he has traveled in the Ladies compartment to know about it in such great detail!)


I have not accepted this comment as well. So it won’t appear in the blog post. But I had the e-mail notification, so here goes.

“great narration...true verbal picturization...and yes agreed that..Admin time is non-chargable but some sick managers take it as 'idle' or 'non-prodcutive time' when they presume that admin time is the time when [actually] hard-working employees are hardly-working... (Was that what I wrote about for about seven pages in word??? Man!! And I thought I was talking about Holi here!!

by thw way my previous comment (The one that I did not accept) was bit out off the fence/charts (So you do know!)...well i guess there may be nothing wrong in the blog owner's spoken english (Listen to the master who for all you know might have an accent worse than Lola Kutty's), while it may be that bcoz of speaking at high pitch/frequency all the time (is he spying on me to be so sure that I’m screaming on top of my lungs “all the time”??? And people who know me, know that my voice is anything but high pitched! How I would kill to achieve that note and sing songs which are supposed to be sung by girls), the vocal chords might have hardened a bit leading to hardening/roughening of the english words that transcend...(he seems to be an expert in voice modulation and vocal chords) i guess my comment would very well safely land in the category of inadvertent error sufficient to be overlooked and ignored showing the true gesture of peace,humanity and universal brothehood and thereby, in return restoring the beliefs in the foregoing...” (??????)


This post has a funny chat conversation that my sister had with one of my closest friends from my gmail account where he thought that it was me on the other end!!

“On the flip side, how could we [the innocent blog readers] be so sure that it was the real HE and HE only, who was on the other side of the Chat...it could well have been his brother.... if this be the case, guess who would be having the last laugh (Ok… why do you even care??? Are you feeling bad that I might be laughed at… How thoughtful!) ...[perhaps i am in a wrong profession, i could very well have become a lawyer..never mind]..” (For you and your lawyergiri; you seemed to have missed the most basic fact in the post. If you read really carefully, he was the one initiating the conversation… So if it was anyone else but him, they wouldn’t be able to talk so confidently. I think you should not be a lawyer… AT ALL… And if you are one, I pity those who would come to you for help)


After all this absurdity, he had the audacity to write an email (How do I know its a 'he'?? He doesn't have a profile picture or a concrete name, but has a Boy's picture as his yahoo Avtaar, which I hope he has chosen correctly) which I have posted here entirely with typos again with my comments (in brackets and in italics) to let you guys know what I thought.


“ha ha... (who starts an e-mail with ‘ha ha’???)

just now i noticed that, my comments disappeared from your blog....ha ha...great...I am surprised but not that surprised...after all, all of us are not immune to a simple criticism... (I hope you are, ‘coz you’re going to get more than your share of criticism from this one blogpost!)

I did not mean any offence....(oh! I could see the kindness bouncing off every word you’ve written so far) I mean donot (‘do’ and ‘not’ are two separate words genius! And their conjugation is spelt “don’t”) take by (I think he meant ‘my’ not ‘by’) comment on face value...but you can take it on a depreciated value (really??? Can I? Accounting Standard 6 on Depreciation accounting says that any fixed asset worth Rs. 5,000 or less can be fully depreciated in the year of acquisition. Even though I don't think any of your words even qualify as 'assets' let alone fixed, since I'm positive that the worth of your comment seems to be hardly close to 10 paise… Need I say more???)...but it may still mean the same... (that you are right about)

I am no English Teacher (You sure aren't! Your spelling and grammar speak volumes about your English!) neither did I study English beyond Xth grade (I even doubt THAT. And here in India, it is 10th Standard… not grade!) and neither did I go to UK for studies...but I work with Brits since last 5 years and since the time I started with the British, I come to realise that my english too is pathetic (did you mean your English too is pathetic, meaning it is as pathetic as any other language you are capable of speaking or that your English is too pathetic??) and lacks the charm. (Ah ha!) Indians are taught English like mathematics/physics.... (because he has worked with the “Brits” he's suddenly not Indian anymore???) the English teachers give/hand us the skeleton but donot impart the students the soul of English. If you donot believe in me and I bet that you will agree with me ONCE you watch the BBC news. (why is the 'Once' in caps???) If not interested in BBC news, watch James Bond movies. If James Bond is beyond your liking, then get hold of a british and speak to them one to one and for once listen to how they speak....if not being able to get a british, then do any thing or atleast something to get an English movies DVD...and listen..please... (do anything or at least something????? Whoa! Way too much pressure… I hope I’m able to speak in public knowing now that my spoken English needs to be refined by watching BBC, or if I’m not interested, a James Bond movie, and if that’s beyond my liking, by getting hold of a British person and talking to him one on one and “listening” to how they speak!!! If I’m not able to do THAT, how am I going to face a class of 60+ students after my exams and lecture them??? Oh wait! I know how to do that and I’m doing it pretty darn well!)

I am saying bcoz, after an age it will be extrimely difficult to twist the tongue...(What????) with your abrasive accent (he apparently talks in an accent better than Sean Connery and Pierce Brosnan) and choice of words in your spoken english...you will have less well wishers (I didn’t know accent was the essential criteria to make friends and well wishers.. I just thought you had to be a nice person… What have my parents taught me??? Sigh!) perhaps after you become a professional dealing and communicating with Multi nationals....(oh.. So if I’m going to be working with a multi-national company I will NEED well wishers there… Because otherwise???) In an another way (an another way??? Is that even right?), you look at your life the way it is... (how else am I supposed to look at it??) it may be surrounded by your friends and family and even out of the boundaries of this secure environment, you may be having a very close friends (“a” very close friends) who are just an extension of your close friends and family, but It will not be the same in times to come (Oooo… he’s predicting my future… I better start concentrating…) How you interact within your co-workers and non-co-workers will have an implication on your life and success. With a smooter accent, (I’m guessing he meant ‘smoother’) I am sure you will be having more well wishers and friends. (coz that’s the trick to make friends… Where were you all these years when I was whining in my room all alone because I didn’t have any friends???) In a public sphere you cannot have your CV / Degree /Marks with you to display at least all the time. What you speak and how you translate your thoughts into decibels (I think he’s a sound expert! He’s used the word ‘decibel’ for the second time) will matter... (How????) [Think about this].(I am NOT going to!!!!)

I just read today in TOI, one articale (articAle???) that says "..... any language should trip off the tongue, not be rammed down your throat"
[By Bachi Karkaria's article "Whats your smother tongue" in Times of India, Mumbai Edition dated 13 Nov 2009, Page 22] (Ok! Now it’s definite that he can predict the future… ‘coz he predicted on 12th November, what’s going to be printed in the paper on the 13th!!!! I’m scared for my social life now!!!!)


Had India been not independent, after listening to your english, India would certianly be one... (man I wish I was born when his beloved Brits arrived in India!! I would’ve yelled at the top of my voice and driven them out of here the minute they set foot… I’d be in the school history books then, not Gandhiji, Jawaharlal Nehru, Bhagat Singh, Sardar Vallabhai Patel, etc.) [so sorry for saying this (really??? Are you???) and you can kill me for this..(oh you know.. because of my voice and my abrasive English, I haven’t managed to make any friends which has turned me into a very negative person.. So there are chances that if I know who you are, I may just attack you!) or may choose to ignore] (Ya right! I’m writing this post out because I chose to ignore!)

I mean no harm (I’m sure you don’t) it is just a simple criticism...and please take it in your stride....after all we all are imperfect....I know that I am be (I am be??? That’s a defect for sure!) having more defects in me than anyone else. (oh! So you do know that! Finally… One statement that made sense!)

For god's sake please don't freak out when you get this email (why would I??? For a complete stranger, you are such a lovely person and so nice!)....and please listen to your own voice, and imagine if some one you donot know, speaks to you in the same abrasive english for the first time.........what would be your first impression !!!!...

kind wishes,

schwzik...”


I don’t care enough to justify, but his statement about my voice, language, etc. has appeared more than once in the comments. So I have to say something. It is absolutely not right to comment on someone’s physical attributes like looks, colour, physical structure as people are born with such attributes. This man has formed such a strong opinion based on a few videos that I have posted on this blog and has insisted and reiterated that I need to do something about my voice and my language.

Let me tell you something, I can talk anyway I want when I’m interacting with family and friends, and unless they have a problem, you are to keep your mouth shut (in this case your fingers away from the keyboard when you’re visiting my blog) and your opinions to yourself. So unless you have something to say about the content of the post, stay away.


This leads to the formation of some ground rules for this blog:
  1. New Readers are welcome and I love comments. BUT, unless you have something of relevance to say about the post and it’s content, do not comment because even if you do, your comments won’t be accepted.
  2. People who know me really closely are allowed to make personal comments (fellow bloggers are included.)
  3. I am not against criticism but I’m not going to entertain bullshit! If you post something like this, it will go up on the blog with my insightful inputs and you are not allowed to blame me for it, AT ALL ‘coz you asked for it.
  4. DO NOT under any circumstances, pretend to be an expert and give me advice on how to lead my life and how to "TALK." That is something I'm very good at and don't need to prove to anyone. I sometimes don't take it even from friends and you are nobody to me, not even a face! (you don't have the guts to put your own picture!)

For someone who doesn’t know me at all, he had some nerve to advise me how I need to lead my life. And that too by altering my speech!!!!
Wait??? Does he work for Axis Bank or Maggi??? Is this their way of revenge?????

PS: If you read the Kalsubai post very carefully, I had been coughing incessantly for the past week and the viral infection lasted for about a month (during which the videos which are posted on the blog were shot!) I guess that explains the hoarse-cum-squeaky voice! Not that I needed to justify, but you need to get your facts right before you can pass a judgment. I guess you can totally forget about being a lawyer!

9 comments:

  1. 'Drawing the line'...very apt headliner.. Inke comments, comments nahi, kahaaniyaan hai. Lemme give him a taste of his own medicine. Going by his 'kahanis', I wud clearly think either no one really listens to what he has to say or no one really talks to him. Saari kasar yahaan par poori kar raha hai. He has taken too much unnecessary interest and that too not in the blog posts. He has written as tho he has personally met u and is judging u wayyyy too much.

    Inko subah se koi mila nahi?!?!!?

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  2. Subah se???? Saalon se koi mila nahi lagta hai... And let this be a lesson to anyone who tries to mess with me... Genuine criticism about my writing, an opinion agreeing with the content as well as one that is different than what I have expressed in the blog posts are all more than welcome. I want to know what others think about that!! But this is nonsense!

    And if someone has such a problem with my voice and the way I speak, why did he watch beyond the first video that he saw??? Boredom and joblessness is the cause of all this... People who have no other work, stalk random blogs and give Guru Gyaan without anyone being interested in knowing! :-p

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  3. Hey Niki, Chill maar yaar !!!!! this guy is a loser .. isko kuch kaam nahi hain life main other than commenting shit .. 

    And u dont think abt this scene nemore.. yeh saale ko dekh lenge.. Do well in ur Exams..

    @ the random shit-head, guy wid no-balls ....JBC !!!!!

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  4. Wat a jobless, useless, shameless d***head!!! God...I never knew unemployment could do THIS to people! Piece of advice dude (whoever u r) GET A JOB AND A LIFE!!!

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  5. love dis!!!!!!...............fadu!!!!!!............kya utaari hai...................he is such a loser!!

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  6. Inspired by the tremendous resonse geterated the dude in question will finally get a job...and a life too...

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  7. OMG, Azadji! You've thrashed this guy so thoroughly. Hope he is not fool enough to poke his little nose into your business any more. And a great comeback post, I must admit! But were you a little too eloquent? But it's ok. After all, he should have got his cue when you rejected some of his comments. Serves him well for his audacity. But frankly, I'm now dead scared to comment on your posts too! I'e the habit of becoming a bit critical especially when it comes to someone's creative side. But I hope I'm not fool enough to be so overt and stupid in my comments!

    Peace! and Welcome back! 

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  8. You need not be scared of anything.. Criticism on my creative skills will help me write better and I will lose out on some insightful feedback if you stop commenting! So please, don't restrict your comments for the fear of offending me... Your comments so far have been a delight to read...

    And you being a fellow blogger are allowed to comment (if you read the rules..  :-P )

    Keep reading and keep the feedback coming!  :)

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  9. mind blowing way of shutting up a jerk..hope he has learnt his lesson n takes ur advice seriously, unless of course he'd like to be verbally thrashed again..n probably this time, i might help with a few adjectives too!!
    Cheers!!  ;) :) :-D

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